Sleep when your mind won't stop

When life is turned upside down, sleep is often the first thing to go. You might fall asleep from exhaustion then wake at 3 a.m. with your mind racing. You might lie awake for hours replaying conversations. You might dread bedtime because that is when everything gets loud.

Poor sleep can make everything else feel harder, so caring for it is not a luxury. It is part of getting through.

Why your mind gets louder at night

During the day, tasks and people fill your attention. At night, those distractions fall away. If your body's stress response is still active, your brain may use that quiet time to scan for problems. That is why worries can feel bigger and more urgent in the dark.

Before bed

• Write down what is on your mind an hour or so before bed. Include worries and anything you need to remember for tomorrow. This tells your brain it can let go for now.
• Try to keep a similar wake-up time each day, even after a rough night. A steady wake time tends to help sleep more than a steady bedtime.
• Dim lights in the evening and put your phone out of reach if you can, especially messages that might upset you.
• Cut back on caffeine later in the day, and notice whether alcohol is affecting your sleep. It can make it easier to fall asleep but often disrupts sleep later in the night.
• Give yourself a short wind-down routine, like a shower, stretching or reading something gentle.

If you cannot sleep

Lying in bed fighting to fall asleep often makes it harder. If you have been awake for what feels like a long time, it can help to get up, go somewhere dim and calm, and do something quiet and boring until you feel sleepy. Then go back to bed.

Try slow breathing with a longer exhale, or focusing on the feeling of your body against the bed. If thoughts keep coming, you might say to yourself, 'That is a daytime problem. I will think about it tomorrow.'

Being kind to yourself about sleep

Some nights will be bad, and that is okay. Your body can manage on less sleep for a while. Worrying about not sleeping can keep you awake, so try to treat a poor night as information rather than a disaster.

Rest still counts, even if you are not asleep. Lying quietly with your eyes closed gives your body a break.

When to get more help

If sleep problems go on for weeks or affect your ability to function, talk to your doctor. Cognitive behavioural therapy for insomnia, often called CBT-I, is a well-established, non-medication approach that many people find helpful. A doctor or mental health professional can tell you about options near you.

If you are awake at night and feeling overwhelmed, the 2 AM page is there for you. If you feel unsafe or are thinking about harming yourself, open the 2 AM page or call 9-8-8 (Canada) or your local emergency number.